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Who Are You?

As I drove home earlier,
I can't stop my mind from wandering while my foot and hand manuver through the traffic jam.
The radio is on, the song not making much sense.
Maybe it's just my head being too loud.
Maybe it's the fact that something in me miss typing and writing stories.
For now, this will have to be enough.

Have you ever wonder if you truly know yourself?
Sometimes you are the quiet girl in the class your teacher expect you to be.
Or you are the kind girl who help those in need your church expect you to be.
Sometimes you are the wisest, most considerate person a friend can ever wish for.
One day you are the class clown, the one bigger than life itself, lifting people up.
In another day, you just laugh out loud without any reason.
Some other times, you are just one mean,selfish,cocky human being.

You smile when they are looking.
You put on a brave face for the sake of image.
You wear the clothes they say suits you.
You buy the make up they chose for you.
You do your hair in a way most of them approve.
You laugh when they say a joke even a mean one at times.
You let tears stream down your face in the right moment to catch their attention.
You even say things that you don't realy believe in to please them.

One day you realize that you have been drowning in the midst off all the expectation and hope that people put upon you, with menace sometimes.
Yes, perharps they don't mean it.
It doesn't change the fact that expectation weighs  a ton.
Is it truly what it means to be able to adapt with the circumstances, is it really what it takes to be accepted by the society?
But is it truly worth losing yourself in the proccess?
Which version of you is the real you?
Do you even know?
or maybe it's too late to find the you I wish to know.

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